Deer Hunting Advice from Li'l Tikes

By L.A. Kohl
November 10, 2005

(published in the Wed., Nov. 16, 2005 edition of the "Bullseye")My husband decided to rise early and head out to do a little bow hunting a few days ago. It got him in the mood for the fast approaching gun deer season, and gave him a story to tell at breakfast that morning. The kids love it when he comes back from deer hunting with stories to tell…more often than not, that’s all he comes back with, so he has to make the most of it!

On this particular morning, our two, four and six year old children had lots of counsel and ideas for the next time he decides to go out deer hunting. I thought perhaps all of you avid hunters out there might appreciate their advice – especially since it’s probably more unique than anything you’ll get from a deer hunting video, or a seasoned deer hunter.

First and foremost; “do not let the deers poke you." That could get messy, and would not be any fun.

“Don’t shoot the little ones.” Yes, my kids have seen Bambi, and the last thing you should ever do is go out there and shoot something that looks like Bambi.

“Don’t step on the leaves.” Wow, my husband wishes he could follow this advice, but when you live in the woods, it’s just not an option.

“Shoot the freaky bears and dragons” instead. This was my two year olds advice. He’s a boy, and I suppose shooting deer just doesn’t seem quite adventuresome enough to him…freaky bears and dragons sounded much more worthy of pursuing.

Pray about it. After Nate finished with his near miss stories and we were ready to eat breakfast, our six year old closed her prayer before the meal with this…“and please let dad get better at shooting deers, amen."

This next advice also came from the six year old, who greatly admires her big sister’s ability to make her own bow and arrows from sticks and yarn. She suggested placing this big sister with her self-made bow and arrow on the other side of the deer, and then if dad missed, she could probably get it with her stick arrow. After all, SHE is very good with her bow and arrow. If, per chance, she does miss, she’ll scare the deer in dad’s direction.

Here was a good one - “just run fast after the deer." Makes sense, doesn’t it? If that deer runs away from you, just go run after it.

This final word of wisdom came from the four year old, “you just really need a wise dog…one that can smell antlers” would be best.

That was about the extent of their advice. So, if you haven’t had much luck yet during this deer season, maybe you just need to practice your running abilities, get a wise, antler smellin’ dog, and brush up on your prayers.